Top Ten: Overachievers w/ Their Women

The theme of today's Top Ten comes from the notion of winning. The opposite of losing. The other end of the spectrum of Nas, the woman from the video below and what usher did when he left that pine piece of woman named Chilli for the rabid wombat with whom he fathered a child with in Tameka Foster. I'm making this list, in the truest since of winning which doesn't always have to do with the looks of the woman but the status of the guy too. Such as Jay-Z definitely won snagging Beyonce. Everybody knows that. Jay has been likened to a camel and rightly so but Jay isn't some vagabond. The dude is part owner of an NBA Franchise. His net worth is closer to a billion than a bum. Plus he's successful and in Ms. Knowles absence he probably doesn't have a hard time finding a fine girl to fill her place. So he doesn't make this list. With this as a backdrop I give you the Top Ten Winners:

1.) Sheldon Williams

When you look like this:you might have a better chance of being a Youtube sensation (see: Eli Porter) than co-star of a couple with Candace Parker but Sheldon achieved. Sheldon must have game, definitely definitely not on the hardwood, but in life. NBA players no matter how scrubbish you are get broke off no doubt. According to more than a few NBA sites he's worth $ 6.1 million which isn't bad. Fact is, he walks into any mall in America he could walk out with a few nice looking girls on the strength of his Black Card but he didn't pull one of these golddigging women, he pulled Candace Parker. Professional WNBA Player. Adidas & Gatorade Endorsemee. Model.

That money Sheldon got might impress broke women but it wouldn't impress her. She's not hurting for money. in the face of cynicism, Sheldon won what appears to me as a victory that surpasses any other win to my knowledge. You have to go back to Stedmond (Oprah's former beau) to find another brotha that got over in life more than him and that's a tempered analogy when you consider Oprah was just successful with no looks. Candace got both.

Sheldon won.

2.) Eddie Murphy

This is really more of a lifetime achievement award moreso than relating to any one incident really but to have gotten his wife (also known as Michael Strahan's girlfriend), Scary Spice, & Tracey Edmonds you've won. No denying that. This kind of performance makes up for all the shitty movies he's compiled since 2000, the transvestite citation and the slump his career has been in. We questioned what team you were playing on in the 90's, Eddie. We in the black community didn't know there for a while but you have really come through the last several years with the women. Kudos to you Buddy Love. LOL

3.) Nick Lachey

Jessica Simpson to Vanessa Minillo. Look I'm not saying Jessica Simpson wasn't attractive. She's cool. Jessica Simpson can sing and she looks good in a pair of shorts but she's vanilla on the whole. Plus Vanessa was a Miss America winner I do believe. It just isn't some bias I have in deference to her, although I admit Minillo has been a personal favorite for many years, but Simpson can't compete with that. Nick was in desperate need of a win as I heard somewhere that he didn't sign a prenuptial with Jessica before their marriage as at the time he was banking more than her, but when they divorced he ended up getting half of her inflated funds which is a universal bad look. Men who receive alimony aren't men. But somehow dude rose up and regained control of his manhood and wifed up Vanessa Minillo. That's a win.


4.) Al Reynolds

Star Jones to Single. No further explanation needed.

5.) Marc Anthony
A lot of people front and act like Jennifer Lopez wasn't the hottest chick on the planet for a little while back in the day. There's no denying that. He who shall wife J.Lo shall win. That's without a doubt. Everybody who was with Jennifer Lopez has yet to bounce back quality wise. Diddy went from J.Lo back to Kim Porter. Downgrade. Ben Afflack went from J.Lo to Jennifer Garnder. Downgrade. Marc saw the writing on the wall and just said, I'm probably not going to find equal value elsewhere so he married and had babies with Ms. Lopez and all this despite the fact that he looks like a wet rat or a rotting zombie corpse depending on whose accessing the situation. I mean body, looks and stature. Marc Anthony is by no means justifiably with Jennifer. There's no rational argument why he's with her but he is. He won.

6.) Michael Douglas

The man is with Catherine Zeta Jones. Now this is a little further down the Top Ten list because Michael Douglas is an OG in the line of OGs in his own right. His father is after all Kirk Douglas so he was sprinkled with game from an early age but Catherine Zeta Jones is quality. She's respected as an actress in her own right and exotic to boot and Michael Douglas made that catch. The man is 63 with a 38 year old dimepiece. To give you some perspective, he's got a 30 year old son whose almost as old as his step mom and who I guarantee has a significant other whose definitely not as bad as the chick his old man pulled. Mike ain't even out there all over the top with his either. He's not at Nets games sitting front row with his or attending the Derby with his wife, no Michael is somewhere hiding from the cameras winning privately and to himself, laughing like he's in on an inside joke the rest of us aren't included in.

Touche Michael. Touche.

7.) Kobe Bryant

I despise Kobe. I think he's arrogant, largely overrated and poorly represented by his boisterous, over-the-top cultists and his winning a championship this year would be akin to Iraq winning the war in the middle east. The war against Kobe Stans (Terrorism) is very real. The Lakers must not win it all this year. Can you imagine the madness in the streets if the Lakers win the championship this year? The kind of bedlam and hyperbole written about him will have no end. There will be no offseason this year.We'll go from Kobe in the Finals to Kobe for GOAT to Kobe solves the Democratic Nomination and becomes the Nominee of the party for President to Kobe in the Olympics to how does Kobe respond to such a great season in '07-'08 in '08-'09.

If the Kobe Stans win, the world loses. Kobe Stans are al-Queda.

But that said, Kobe won even if he doesn't play another basketball game.

The man went from being linked to Brandy to his gorgeous wife even if he tried his best to fuck it all up in 2004 in Denver, CO. That was stupid, poorly conceived and he's lucky she didn't leave him, break him off financially (she'd get half) and expose him to the rest of the world as a selfish, dumb asshole who only cares about Kobe. Which is most certainly is. She could have done that but she put arms around him in public, stood by her guy, publicly gave him strength and bore him two cute kids and didn't allow him to lose it all when all around him his life was crumbling. Not only is the woman fine, but she's classy and has exhibited more character than Kobe ever dreamed he'd have.

Kobe's got money. Kobe could probably get other fine women, even though from some of the leaked photos of the 19 year old from his Colorado frolic that might be a stretch, but it would be hard for Kobe to replicate that kind of quality of person elsewhere.

8.) Jermaine Dupri

Look I'm going to make this plain and simple.

She gains nothing financially from being with him. They're bank accounts is probably a wash.

She looks like this and he looks like a bug.



They're both about the same age.

Dupri overachieved.

He won.

9.) Curtis Conway

I remember Curtis Conway vaguely as a wide receiver who sucked. He played in the NFL for a few seasons and left the game and no one cared. So tell me this, how does he end up with Laila Ali at the end of the day? Can anyone explain that one to me? He looks like a beat up Quentin Richardson. She looks like Heaven. It makes no sense. Plus she's probably got more money than him. No lie. Boggles the mind.

10.) Kevin Federline

Time hasn't been necessarily kind to Mrs. Spears but there's no denying this was one of the biggest wins in the history of man. Kevin Federline had no business pumping gas for Britney let alone shattering a generation of young men's dreams and getting with her in her prime. She was universally regarded as top of the line quality and on everybody's short list of women back then and Kevin's bum ass took home the gold prize. He hasn't done anything more than my next door neighbor and he took home one of the dopest chicks of my time. He went from Shar Jackson to Britney Spears.

I believe in miracles, not because of of the 2004 Boston Red Sox or Santa Claus but because of Kevin Federline.