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(Spotted at C&D)

Nearly 60 Percent Of Black Childen Can't Swim

(MSNBC) NEW YORK - Nearly 60 percent of African-American children cannot swim, almost twice the figure for white children, according to a first-of-its-kind survey which USA Swimming hopes will strengthen its efforts to lower minority drowning rates and draw more blacks into the sport.

Stark statistics underlie the initiative by the national governing body for swimming. Black children drown at a rate almost three times the overall rate. And less than 2 percent of USA Swimming's nearly 252,000 members who swim competitively year-round are black.

To the surprise of nobody this study comes out and people hardly bat an eye. I don't think I even heard or read this in the news last week when the study was published. Black people can't swim. Big whoop. Black people and water have never been friendly. Black women will kill someone if they get their hair wet (I know this one first hand as my sister almost caught a case when we were younger and I came at her with a Super Soaker.) Black people strangely don't find themselves victims to sharks very often. Why, you may ask? Because you have to be in the ocean, quite a ways from the beach and no we don't venture that far out. We're either somewhere in air conditioning ignoring summer or if we are outside, we're concentrating more on the women than the wild and waterlife. Damn Media Outlets and News Companies could have came to me if they wanted the real inside track on things black people don't do for less money if they really want to get an inside perspective into black people, but here's a small sample of the data I offer

Dangerous Things Black People Don't Do:

• Own wild pets outside of pitbulls. (i.e Tarantulas, South American/African Snakes)
• Ride Rollercoasters that go upside down or sideways. Too much risk of falling out.
• Investigate strange noises at night. We just don't do that. Horror movies don't catch us slipping.
• Eat what we don't recognize. If we can't readily identify something or we're unsure of whether it will kill us or not we usually err on the side of caution. If I have to offend you and not eat something that could give me a South Argentinian Rectal Bug, so be it.
• Don't do X-Games stunts and tricks. The ground suits us just fine. There's nothing I can do in the air that I can't do on the ground. Besides, I love the faculty of all my limbs. I got too much living to do to be paralyzed. Imagine living the first 20 years of your life normal and without restriction and living the last 60 on a metal chair with wheels. Umm, I'll pass.
• Camp. Nope. No way. No how. Having a toilet, HBO and air conditioning is always better than squatting behind a bush in a hole in the ground with the threat of a spider crawling up my asshole. Going to sleep, with the very real possibility of a live ensemble of Disney characters that might pop up while I was resting would keep me up all night.

Take it from me, an actual factual Negro that all of this is based on proven scientific evidence. Black people complain all day about a whole host of real problems and some made up nonsense but we'd much rather live in a world somewhat against us then be dead and have more problems than the ones life gives us and the ones we perceive. Real talk.

We Lost Again

...and by 'we' I mean black people. Yet another chapter in the book of Shenanigans and TomFoolery

Wow, Eli Porter Is One Of the Greatest Internet Sensations Of All-Time

If you've been living under a rock or aren't used to Youtube, you need to see this video that's spawned an internet cult following rivaling Ron Paul's. Enjoy



Funny & disturbing, right? Well I felt funny after watching it the first time too but after the 30th view I got over those guilty feelings. Anyway as you can imagine such a video would inspire other Youtube remixes of this video where others who want to capitalize on the original could piggyback on to fame. Well most of those videos suck, but there are a few that don't. Like the next few I posted.

Eli goes toe to toe with James Brown in this clip. LOL



And now Eli Porter over one of the nicest beats I've heard in a minute



Eli > Your Life.

Monday's Musings

1.)When you hear "I come from a small town" does it sound like "There aren't a lot of black people where I'm from and I might say something that could be seen as racist from time to time" to you to?

2.)The problem with living is dying. Doesn't it feel like an unnegotiated compromise we all agree upon at birth?

3.)If Barack Obama doesn't win Puerto Rico on June 3rd, shouldn't black people collectively revoke the right of PR's to say 'nigga' since they don't support niggas?

4.)If the record companies are seeing such record low sales projections and they're so anxious to rejuvenate business then common sense should point to them pressuring other companies who produce the rewritable blank cd's to raise the price of their product in bulk and at the same time lower the individual price of the record label's albums. Let's be frank, if record companies are selling one album for $12 and the consumer can buy a 50 pack of black cd's for $5 and can just duplicate the $12 album and still have 49 blank cd's left then that's just bad business and the suits really should have learned this by now. The sagging numbers have been fairly static for a long time now. They probably aren't going to see a spike anytime soon. Isn't it time for fresh new ideas?

5.)Why does personal greed and individual ambition always seem to win out in the eternal struggle against collective good? If Rev. Jeremiah Wright's 15 minutes of fame can be stretched into a book deal (you KNOW one's coming) , it seems that for him overshadows one of our own rising and ascending into a position to lead the country forward and shatter unbreached walls as recently as a decade ago would be unfathomable.

6.)What could possibly be Dwyane Wade's motivation for being romantically linked with Star Jones? He's got money. He's got fame. He's got more of each than her.

7.)People who saddle Barack Obama with questions of his pastor, whom he divorced unequivocally this week, are generally hypocrites themselves. I say that because who amongst us hasn't had a family member, an associate at work, or a friend whose made off-color jokes and comments who wouldn't make them in less demographically-challenged company? The thing is, we're not all judged via the same merit that seems to surround Obama in the media and public circles. It's not fair because if we don't ourselves denounce every single person that has said something that coincides with what we know to be right and decent and then distance ourselves from the, then we are being hypocrites.

8.)Why do people still confuse Hispanic as a race and not an ethnicity? Hispanic is not a color. You can't look in a box of Crayons and find a Hispanic crayon. Hispanics come in a myriad of colors just like every other group of folks worldwide. There are black Hispanics and white Hispanics and everything in between. Pele is as black as I am. We're not the same culturally but race wise, we are. Just as I'm not ethically similar to a Kenyan because I'm African American we're still both black. I'm counting down the days until a rapper says he has a Hispanic colored whip in all his ignorant splendor.

9.)Why does Hillary Clinton carry so much favor with the Gay Community when historically the Clintons have offered very little in the way of support of them? Don't Ask Don't Tell is as discriminative as it gets. Voting against your interests is as common amongst gays as it is amongst poor white conservatives I suppose.

10.)If Barack wants to win the White House this Fall, he needs to seriously consider adding Kobe Bryant to the ticket. Kobe can carry California. Kobe is the only acceptable African-American that Latinos will actually rally around and support through it all. Kobe has the experience of 12 years as a professional. Kobe's battle tested and has shown a fighting spirit in the face of adversity that would have crushed other people.

When you really think about it Kobe Bryant and Barack Obama compliment each other the best out of any other ticket you can put together. Kobe came in a white woman, Obama came out of a white woman. Kobe's got the establishment behind him, Barack brings new people into the fold and appeals to people who otherwise wouldn't even be interested in the process, both carrying two important constituencies.

Famous People Who Look Alike

And now for the childish amusement for everybody under 12 or of my maturity level, famous people who look like things or other famous people:

Andrew Bynum & Mykelti Williamson

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Lamar Odom & Franklin the Turtle

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Phil Jackson & Cnl. Sanders

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Steve Kerr & William Sadler

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John Stockton & Jim Cavezal

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Manu Ginobili & Balki

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Adonal Foyle & Djimon Hounsou

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John Kitna & Cotton Hill

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Carlos Boozer & Uday Hussein (also a German Shephard)

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Rick Carlisle & Jim Carrey

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Kevin Garnett & A Billy Goat

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Mark Johnson & Heathcliff

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Levarr Burton, Jamal Tinsley & Black Thought

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Ludacris & Pluto

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Chris Bosh & a T-Rex

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Brian Skinner & Rapper Ali

Soulful Sunday

Damn man, I can't believe I'm going to be 24 in four days. That truly sucks. I feel too young to be 24. Why is it that you never feel more your current age until the week before your next birthday? It takes 51 weeks to get adjusted to your age and right when you're comfortable in it and it fits just right on you, life be like 'take this here year and go about your business pimpin.'

R.Kelly - How I Feel
Al Green f/ Anthony Hamilton - Lay It Down
Conya Doss - Stay
Pharrell - I Was Waiting For You

I hate (comedian) Jonah Hill but....

....but this SNL skit was funny as hell. LOL. Enjoy (n/h)

Mariah Carey & Nick Cannon Married?

Now this site isn't a gossip site because amongst other things I'm a heterosexual 23 year old guy whose got enough in his own life to worry about dishing gossip and the like but I can't be the only one who just heard about this five minutes ago. You're telling me Nick and Mariah have been in each other's presence longer than the five minutes they apparently were when this moment from a Teen's Choice Award Show found them on stage together?


You know what, I'm not even mad. Well maybe a little. I mean I didn't even have enough time to hate on them when they were dating. Well, this is a definite downgrade from Nicklaus. Especially since you were with Kim Kardashian before the whole neighborhood ran through her. Mariah is a good 7 or 8 years past her prime and has been through the 13th Infantry herself but then again, you are still Nick Cannon, right? You're still every bit as corny as you've ever been. You've still only been on one good movie, right? Sounds about as right as couples you come by in Hollywood though. It ain't like y'all are Shawn & Beyonce Carter but with the right lighting and from a distance if it's raining outside and y'all are jogging, the paparazzi might be fooled into taking pictures of you two thinking that you were them because let's be honest, y'all ain't shit individually and if you were an algebraic equation together y'all would be the square root of monkey feces. I've never enjoyed anything either of you have ever done. I just wish I could have been at the wedding. I would have thrown rice at you. Scalding hot rice.

Would You Let Kimbo Slice Punch You In The Leg For $100?

LOL.